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When Squashy Grandma's teeth get stuck behind the radiator, Abbie calls the Very Odd Job Man. Matt Platt and his even odder daughter Perdita invite Abbie to the Hair Museum, where history has hairstyles and fish have beards. Drawn into a hair-raising hunt for Perdita's mom, Abbie befriends a cast of whacky characters. But waddling in the shadows is a fiendish foe: the white-suited, lemon-haired Dr. Hubris Klench. This quirky tale, full of screwballs and pitfalls, will tickle children, parents, and squashy grandmas alike.
swallowed a scream. A fat hand was coming towards the bin. It was clutching the end of an ice cream. Abbie ducked. The bin lid opened wide. There was a hard-hearted whiff of men’s soap, then a soft-hearted waft of vanilla. A ball of cold hit her head. ‘So Charlie,’ came Burger Man’s voice, ‘now you come vizz me. Ve go shoppink for security cameras. Perhaps ziss girl returns tomorrow. Ve catch her on screen.’ Abbie licked the ice cream dribble from her cheek and listened to Big Ears’ protests.
there’s a good lad. Oh, hang on a sec.’ Grinning at Ludge, he brought Grandma’s tissue to his nose and gave a long, loud blow. 19 - Waiting pains ‘… Then I put my hand into the pike’s mouth,’ said Coriander, ‘and pulled. The hair was all tangled round its teeth.’ Mum’s eyes were bigger than her face. ‘Did you get bitten?’ ‘No. I propped the fish’s mouth open with a Pikespike. That’s a little stick with a fork at each end. Matt made it for me.’ Coriander bit her lip. ‘Oh. What are they doing
pretend-to-scratch-your-lip-while-picking-your-nose trick. ‘Abbie,’ he said, ‘get the Hoover.’ ‘You what?’ He did his don’t-argue-with-me word jiggle. ‘The Hoover, Abbie. Get.’ Shaking her head, Abbie went into the hall and wheeled out the Hoover from the cupboard under the stairs. She dragged it by the neck into the sitting-room like a dog on a lead. Dad pointed the tube down the back of the radiator. He switched it on. Nothing. ‘Try plugging it in, Dad.’ The Hoover growled into life. The
‘Ziss I should haff done before. But your sister,’ he spat at Coriander, ‘said do not bozzer.’ He glared at Melliflua. ‘Ass Mummy vould say, blood runss sicker zan vorter.’ ‘But not visky,’ said Dirk, laughing so loudly you’d think it was funny. ‘Well done, ol’ frui’. ’ He raised his glass then drained it. ‘Now,’ said Klench. ‘Ze potions pleass.’ Dirk threw his empty glass in the air. It smashed on the floor next to Constable Wibberly, who shrieked and sat up. Dirk gave the gun to Melliflua.
and took out five brown nuggets. He held them out in his palm to Grandma. ‘Oh forget it,’ she muttered and grabbed the packet from him. Vinnie liked grabbing games. He grabbed the sugar bowl and tipped it over Winnie’s shaved head. Abbie giggled and helped herself to thirds. Breakfast had been brilliant over the last three days. Because of all the visitors Mum had organised shifts: 1) Orangs 2) Children 3) Grown ups But the children and Grandma had voted to eat with the orangs. Abbie loved